What did Chris and I do this weekend? Well, let's see...we went and saw a couple movies; one of which was Spring Breakers.
The previews for this movie made it appear to run the same lines as the movie Savages with Blake Lively.
Chris and I thought, "what the heck, let's go see a couple movies on Saturday and Spring Breaker's looks pretty good." Little did we know.
All the reviews for this movie said that it was James Franco's best performance yet and that the Disney girls have "gone wild." Let's just say only one of those are true.
In order for you to understand the disappointment and resentment in spending a whopping $6.75 for a ticket, I will summarize the entire movie for you.
1. Starts with about 15 minutes of spring break "girls gone wild" footage. Ladies, if you have a significant other, you will spend the duration of the movie resisting the impulse to cover his eyes.
2. Four trashy girls decide to rob a restaurant for money for spring break. Then, because of the "artistic" direction of the movie, everything that was said was repeated throughout the movie.
3. Drugs, alcohol, nudity, and cursing were the focal point of this movie. Between that and Vanessa Hudgens hair screaming to get her roots touched up, there wasn't much more for you to focus on.
4. They spend their money on scooters, so when they get arrested, they have no money for bail. Scooters?! Disney much?
5. Creepy drug dealer (James Franco) bails them out, sends Selena Gomez home, gets pink haired girl shot, and screws Vanessa Hudgens and Ashley Benson in a pool...together...for five minutes.
6. In retaliation to pink haired girl getting shot, Vanessa, Ashley, and James go on a killing spree of the opposing drug dealer. James is shot by the first guy they see. Ashley and Vanessa then continue on killing all 25 people at the house each using a pistol. I mean, I'm no gun expert but I'm pretty sure they didn't have enough bullets for that...but what do I know.
7. If this wasn't enough, the entire movie consisted of snip-its of "girls gone wild" footage, James Franco saying "Spring break forever", and weird lighting clips that would only be acceptable if you were high or drunk while watching.
Why am I telling you all of this? We had people walk out of the theater. We stayed because we had paid to see it. If you were even considering going to watch this movie, DON'T! I'm just trying to save you the money, time, and water bill you will incur from trying to clean yourselves from the disgust you will pick up from watching it.
Hope this helps you make an informed decision prior to spending the money at the theaters.